donutsornonuts:

We are gathered here today because SOMEBODY *glares at coffin* couldn’t stay alive.

rnicrophone:

bombing:

cop: who the hell ordered all these pizzas

me: you said i got one phone call

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julialost:

Fanfictions with OC be like : 

"I was rather ordinary, not really pretty, with my heart shaped face, full lips, long eyelashes with auburn curled hair going down to my hips and my mismatched eyes, one gold one silver"

joelbyeman:

"you choose your favourite character because they remind you of yourself"

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altogetherdrop:

altogetherdrop:

where’s that picture from fckh8 that’s just a picture of jennifer lawrence saying “gay rights!”

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i found it

bewbin:

thefinestlad:

bewbin:

I just slept for 15 hours what I miss?

This dick

oh thank god i thought i missed something big 

teenbitch:

how u gon carry a baby for 9 months and name it gary

safety-officer-barto:

badsciencejokes:

There’s a fine line between a numerator and a denominator.

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